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Crack Kills (Almost)

I remember a comedian from, like twenty years ago, when safe sex was first gaining momentum.  He talked about how expensive condoms were, then he realized, "Latex!  That's the same stuff in house paint!  So now I just keep a can of house paint by the bed, dip that puppy in there, and I'm good for a year!"

Now, it was funny, but it also underscores how there are two ways of looking at shopping.  One is that everything in the store is sold by greedy capitalists who don't have to charge so goddamn much when it can't cost that much to make it, and then there's the you get what you pay for argument.  What does it take to change something from one point of view to the other?  Well....

New Jersey (official state motto:  You have the right to remain silent....) has put out a BOLO for some enterprising gents who figured butt enhancements weren't that tough to do.  Six women from Essex County wanted to get shapelier buttocks and allowed these guys to inject silicone into their buttocks.  Not only was this not a properly licensed procedure, but the silicone used was crossmatched.  It's tub caulk.

Let me write that on the board in bold, italics, and underline...TUB CAULK!!!  These women figured silicone was silicone and let these DIY experts inject them in the ass with it!  I guess they should be glad the caulk missed their brains.

Police aren't saying if the six cases of women from the same county who have tub caulk injected in their asses are "related."  Yeah, I'm sure it's coincidence.  This is what happens when you hire Randy Disher to be your chief of police.

The police also want to remind you that, if you're going to have physique-altering procedures done, you should seek out someone properly licensed.  This is Peter G with the "No Shit!" News At Nine.

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