May 13th, 2010


If I Give You My Lunch Money, Will You Go Away?

The Great Wall Of China is falling apart.  (Don't laugh, it's been standing since the 1600's.  How long do you think that carport you built is going to last?)  PETA is offering to help pay for some of the repairs.  In exchange, they get to put up an ad.  "This morning, PETA sent a letter to Cai Wu, China’s minister of culture, offering to place an ad on the Great Wall that could help save the iconic structure, which has been crumbling partially because of the continuous stampede of tourists–including countless overweight Americans–at the site. The ad shows a huge American tourist, who’s visible from outer space, next to the words “It’s the Wall That We Should See From Space, Not You. Go Vegan.” In the letter, PETA points out that vegans are significantly trimmer than meat-eaters are and that a plant-based diet is animal-friendly."

Yeah.  Treat animals with respect.  But fat people?  Go ahead, make 'em feel like shit!  I mean, I thought they learned their lesson after their "Save The Whales" ad campaign that targeted fat people.  But nope, they're just getting warmed up!

Oreos are among the items PETA lists as animal friendly.  I wonder how much trimmer I'd be if my entire diet consisted of that?

And, in addition to, on top of that, you can't see the Great Wall from space.  It's the width of a highway, and you can't see those from space, either.

May I recommend some fish?  It's brain food, ya know, and they clearly need all they can get.

Does This Constitute Whoring Himself Out?

Hey, is that $5 I see in your pocket?  Why, yes, it is!  And I bet you're wondering what you're going to do with it.  I mean, you can buy a CD with it.  You can't get a value meal with it.  You can't even see a first run movie with it.  So what can you do with a fiver?  I have a minor suggestion.  And, no, it has nothing to do with Stephen Baldwin....

During the 2008 D's nomination, Hillary ran up a fantastic amount of debt trying to grab the nomination and stop the Barack Obama juggernaut.  They paid $24 mil to Mark Penn and his political consulting firm, Penn Schoen Berland.  At the end of 2008, they still owed Penn $5.4 mil.  They are now down to $771,000 that they need to finish paying him.

Bill Clinton has a novel solution.  He is raffling off...himself.

“How would you like the chance to come up to New York and spend the day with me?”  I'm guessing I'd be Carrie and he'd be Samantha.  Just make an online donation, minimum amount $5, get entered in the raffle, and A WINNAR IZ U!!!1!

I should point out the the Clinton war chest still has $624,000 in the bank.

So, here's what you do with that $5....

Go to the site.

Make a donation in the name of "Howard Stern."

And if he wins, pray the press catches every last detail.....

Well, THAT Certainly Didn't Take Long....

So, DC is bragging that Brightest Day is a new era for their superhero comics, a chance to move away from the defeatism they actively cultivated.

Ryan Choi, the new Atom, is attacked in his home by Deathstoke and his Titans and killed.  They deliver the body to Dwarfstar, one of his arch enemies.

Thank God this is a bright new era for superheroes!  Otherwise, that would be really cheap and depressing!
Moe Cowbell

Another Special Notice For "Swim Buddies" Band Members

To get the full effect, please go into your music library and cue up "Get Happy" by b*witched.

mornblade , get them vocal chords ready.
After playing Rock Band 2 for four months, I FINALLY unlocked Ace Of Spades '08!

Took long enough!

Other songs added to the playlist are Uncontrollable Urge by DEVO, Panic Attack by Dream Theater (oh, that song is MURDER on drums) and Painkiller by Judas Priest.  That leaves me with three more songs total to unlock -- "Alabama Getaway" by the Grateful Dead, "Bodhisattva" by Steely Dan, and "Ramblin' Man" by the Allman Brothers.

But I'm expecting Ace Of Spades next time.  DO NOT FAIL ME, MORTAL!