April 7th, 2011

Peter G

File This Under "Life Is What You Make Of It"

There's a reason My Little Pony sells like crazy.  Girls love horses.  Give a girl a horse and you've got a friend for life.

And, the converse -- deny a girl a pony, and you've got a lot to undo.


Regina Mayer is a girl who lives in Laufen, Germany, a hop, skip, and a jump away from Austria.  This is farm country.  Her family has a farm.  Naturally, she wanted a pony.  Two years ago, mom and dad said no.

Regina quickly shook off the disappointment, however.  She decided to try training one of the family cows, Luna, for riding.

She succeeded.

Luna is more cat than horse -- she only does things if she wants to do them.  But when she does, Regina rides her around the countryside and they even jump makeshift obstacles like beer crates.

Maybe her parents should have bought her a go kart instead.

There's A Train Leaving Town At Noon. Be Under It.

"Get used to it, kid.  You're a celebrity now."
"I thought you had to do something good to be a celebrity."
"Not if you do it colorfully."
-- Major League

One of my favorite metaphors that I created was describing certain people as being like a bad chili dog -- just when you think you've got them down and everything's settled, they come rumbling back up again and make you feel sick.

Today's recipient of the label?  Rob Granito.

The plagiarizer, swiper, liar, namedropper, and outright fraud?  Yeah.  That asshole.

Web sites such as Comics Cube! are getting this email from an Alison G (no relation to me, thank God).  Some are listing "Alison" as Granito's wife (Alison denied this to one web site, saying she is just a publicity agent.  Show me a pro PR rep that will handle a bottom feeder like this):

Dear Comics News, Blogs, and Journalists:

March 2011 was a month that the comics industry, and comics fandom, was not expecting! A month where suddenly comics websites became 'TMZ-like', and scandal and tabloid excitement erupted. This was due to the controversial Rob Granito.

We ask you to consider looking past personal feelings and judgement to consider the following:

-A Facebook Group about Robert Granito had over 3,000 members in less than a week

-Websites such as comicsalliance, Wired, and many others made Rob Granito a major headline

-An entire convention panel is due to Rob Granito, called 'How Should An Artist React To Being Granito'd'?

So, regardless of personal judgement you must admit that Rob Granito creates controversy- and controversy attracts attention. Rob Granito gets attention. Rob Granito gets people talking.

The Blog owner at All Things Geeky even explained how he had thousands of visitors to his site when he had never experienced that before. Rob Granito has gotten more attention and caused more talking amongst his detractors and his fans than any other comics professional!

Now is YOUR chance to take advantage of this red-hot story. As Charlie Sheen has proven in the mainstream media, controversy sells. It has been proven, and suggested by the convention fans blog that Rob Granito is the Charlie Sheen of Comics. And just like Charlie Sheen caused MAJOR headlines with his controversial 20/20 interview, now YOU can get Rob Granito to sit for an interview for your site or blog!

Rob Granito will live up to his image as the bad boy of comics, who admits he has made some mistakes (but who hasn't?) but also points out that comics fandom at large does not know the WHOLE story. Find out how Rob Granito began as an artist. Discover what his experience was with the legendary Dave Stevens. Find out what REALLY went down with Mark Waid. Learn how Rob feels about the comics professionals who have derided his name in the past few weeks like Ty Templeton Jamar Igle, Al Rio, and more!

We assure you Rob Granito will live up to his interview commitments. We guarantee candid, explanatory revelations. Rob Granito proved he shook up the world in March 2011! Now watch him light up the Spring comics schedule. "I will keep going to conventions", he says. Also, why did BleedingCool decide to break the Rob Granito story out of nowhere? Why was it pursued with such a fever? "There is more there that you dont know about", says Rob.

ALL WEBSITES: the following is a list of Rob' interview fees

-e-mail interview (20 questions ONLY) $150.00 PayPal
-30 minute phone interview $200.00 PayPal
-1 Hour Phone or Skype interview $250.00 PayPal

Thank you for your time. We look forward to working with you.

Alison c/o Robert Granito Art Services

"The Charlie Sheen Of Comics."  Jesus titty-fucking Christ.

A couple of people on message boards are suggesting people ask THEM their questions, and they can print their answers as if Granito stole them from them.  Okay, THAT'S funny.

If Daredevil is the Man Without Fear, Granito is the Man Without Shame.  Granito, that is really some set of balls you've got.
Epic Fail

Oh, And About The Rob Granito Interview Letter....

...did anyone else notice he misspelled Jamal Igle's name?

Find out what he thinks of the industry pros that have been talking smack about him?  Here's a guess -- "Oh, fuck!  They're on to me!"

And as long as I'm wishing, I'd like a pony and an ice cream, too.