May 22nd, 2014

Kill It With Fire

Sine Timore Early Warning System: Welcome To Your Nightmare

McDonald's.  One of the biggest companies in the world.

So, when they screw up, they screw up BIG.  No half measures with these folks.

Advertising is the way to find the biggest mistakes.  Smaller ones abound (do NOT order McCafe items.  The machines are supposed to be cleaned out regularly, and most of the staff isn't trained.  I have on reliable authority that it gets pretty funky in there), but the biggies happen, such as this billboard that was lampooned in The Boondocks:

iwouldhitit

bo0504125kt

Things have been pretty quiet, but they've erupted again.  Part of what makes McDonald's so prominent is its mascot, a clown named Ronald.  McDonald's for some reason is pursuing healthy eating crowds (salads make up less than 10% of their sales, so it doesn't seem like anyone's falling for it).  I think they were the first to give kids the option of apple slices in their Happy Meals, and are also now offering Gogurt.  But to really sell the whole thing, they decided they needed a mascot.

Meet Happy.

happy-meal

...yeah....

He officially launches this Friday, tomorrow, just in time for the Memorial Day weekend.  So before you put the kids to bed, you might want to keep that tranq gun handy.

WE GO TO DEFCON RED!!!  EVERYBODY DUCK AND FUCKIN' COVER!!!
V For Vendetta

Pay No Attention To The Man Behind The Curtain

With decisive victories for marriage equality, people are laughing at the bad day the National Organization of Marriage, or NOM, is having.

Please.  Curb your enthusiasm.

Because the REAL fun could be starting soon.  On May 28th.

Back in 2009, NOM was stumping against the marriage equality law in the state of Maine.  They funneled almost $2 mil to Stand For Marriage Maine to defeat the measure.  That's about 65% of the money SFMM got.  Well, it didn't work out, marriage equality was approved in a 2012 referendum.

Now, here's the fun part.

NOM's tactics got it an investigation from the Maine Commission on Governmental Ethics And Election Practices.  Just this week, the commission issued a report.  The report is a bloodbath, saying the didn't register as a ballot question committee and it didn't file campaign finance reports back in 2009.  It concludes this was a "significant violation of the law."

The upshot?  NOM could be fined $50,000.

The money shot?  They could also be force to reveal the identities of ALL their donors.

MWA-HA-HA-HA-HA!

Naturally, NOM is denying this.  Chairman John Eastman said, "NOM strongly denies the findings of the staff report in Maine.  We did not raise funds designated for the Maine campaign and fully complied with Maine law.  The staff has ignored uncontested sworn evidence from donors that we did not designate any contributions for the referendum effort and instead has focused on circumstantial evidence to support its conclusion when a fair reading of those circumstances suggests the opposite.  We look forward to presenting our case to the full Commission."

The hearing is on May 28th.

That sound you hear is a bunch of asshole homophobes fearing the loss of their anonymity.
Kermit And Piggy

Whoa! Shit!

This is wrong.  So so wrong.  But goddamn, is it funny.

New X-Men Film Features Bryan Singer Going Back In Time To Molest His Younger Self