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Did Someone Say, VANITY CON?!?

Dear readers of Sine Timore,

I want to be your king.

Not for life.  Just for two days.

Today I read an interesting little tidbit.  It seems the country of Liechtenstein (between Sweden and Austria) is allowing people to "rent" the country.  For $70,000 a night, two night minimum, you and 150 people get the run of the ruling house of Liechtenstein.  You get an honorary key and your own currency.

That means, with those numbers, 150 people put up just under $934 each.  Travel is separate, so...well, I was going to say travel in the off season, but when exactly is the season for Liechtenstein?

Sooooo...welcome to the country of Freedonia.  What would I do?

*  Supreme ruler -- me, obviously.
*  Poet Laureate -- ying_ko_4
*  Minister Of War -- mornblade  Your mission is to plot the invasion of France.  Even with two days and a bunch of tourists, I believe it is doable.
*  Minister Of Cultural Events -- clionona  With 150 people, not everyone is going to share my idea of a good time, so come up with activities they can enjoy, too.  Bonus points if it involves wizard robes.  Just keeping thinking about how this is going to look on your resume.
*  Jester -- Seth Green.  Please, for the love of God.
*  Ministers Of Research -- Adam and Jamie from MythBusters.  They WILL be required to blow something up during my all-too-brief reign.
*  Minister Of Education -- Hellaine
*  Minister Of The Arts And Humanities -- balloonhat
*  TV stations will show an MST3K marathon
*  All men will be required to own at least one cool hat
*  Official Flag -- the Gadsden flag
*  Official Bird -- the middle finger
*  Official Song -- Play That Funky Music by Wild Cherry
*  Official Mermaid -- Kylie Minogue.  I wouldn't doing anything seedy, all she has to do is look sexy, sing, and let me take pictures.  Oh, and she has to sing "Beyond The Sea" at least once for me.  Alternates are Jaclyn Smith (who always looks good no matter what her age) and Jessica Alba, who is an actual certified diver

Well, no one said unconditional worship would be easy....

Comments

( 4 comments — Leave a comment )
clionona
Jul. 16th, 2011 12:06 am (UTC)
Minister Of Cultural Events? Me? Really??? I'd be quite honored to serve, Your Grace!

*bows*

...

*runs off to research the climate of Liechtenstein*
sinetimore
Jul. 16th, 2011 04:39 pm (UTC)
I think everybody would love a dunk tank with Paris Hilton and Charlie Sheen. ;-)
mornblade
Jul. 16th, 2011 01:41 am (UTC)
Two days huh... If I can borrow Adam and Jamie, I they may be able to help me complete my task while I help them complete theirs. And if I angle it right, I may be able to get French college students to assist us both.

How many things you want blown up? Can they be overturned French cars?

Speaking of which, may I suggest The Stig as Minister of Transportation? He can bring the presenters of the UK Top Gear as his advisors.
sinetimore
Jul. 16th, 2011 04:39 pm (UTC)
The Stig as Minister Of Transportation? Done, and done.

How many things do I want blown up? I will simply remind you of the MythBusters credo -- "If it's worth doing, it's worth overdoing."
( 4 comments — Leave a comment )

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