I wish to God this was a joke.

Yesterday, while having my self-congratulatory hoagie, I heard a radio ad.  I usually tune them out, but what was filtering through was so odd, I focused my attention on it.

A local collective of clinics is apparently trying to drum up some business.  The ad was about getting a vasectomy.  And they were selling it in the most stereotypical way they could -- recovery from the procedure takes three days, SO WHY NOT SCHEDULE A VASECTOMY AROUND WHEN YOUR FAVORITE MARCH MADNESS TEAMS ARE PLAYING?!?

Seriously.  The commercial was pitching that, since you HAVE to sit around and do nothing, why not take advantage of that?

The commercial mentioned that the doctors have the tourney schedules and are ready to work with you to coordinate things to give you the most for your time.  They will also provide you with a special recovery kit that includes pajamas, slippers, a beer cozy, and a complimentary bag of frozen peas.  I can't wait to see how this gets rung up under Obamacare.

Besides, any guy who is that much into sports that he will have a vasectomy just to maximize his time in front of the TV is going to be wrapped up in the games.  That means he'll be moving around as he cheers or jeers.  Which could cause more problems than a bag of frozen peas can deal with.

Ladies?  Any guy who pulls this stunt with you?  Check his recovery levels by punching him in the nuts.