Peter G (sinetimore) wrote,
Peter G
sinetimore

No Good Choices

I meant to write something about this about a year ago, but I didn't have the time due to work concerns.  This entry features a bit of a revelation about me that some, depending on how long they've been reading and/or how well they know me, may find shocking.

The subject of this post is Suzy Favor Hamilton, a former Olympian.  Most people don't give two shits about Olympians unless they are darling tiny girls (the figure skaters and gymnasts).  For every one Carl Lewis, there are three Kristi Yamaguchis.  So you will be forgiven if you don't know who she is.

Hamilton was a three-time Olympian (which is actually a shockingly long time to be an Olympian).  She was also a three-time Big Ten female athlete of the year while she was at Wisconsin, starting in 1988.  She has seven national titles, the most recent in 1999.  The Big Ten decided to name their female athlete of the year award after her.

However, when you're a professional athlete, you need something to do when your time as a competitor is up.  She ran a real estate brokerage and gave motivational speeches.

Hamilton also became a call girl.

Hamilton started working for Haley Heston's Private Collection under the name "Kelly Lundy".  Her going rate was $600 an hour.  She blames it on postpartum depression and escape anxiety, but I think the real answer is simple -- times are tough, and it was the only option she had available to her.

Initially, only Hamliton's husband knew about this.  So what happened?  Surprisingly, it wasn't random Internet denizens who stumbled on it as usually happens.  She actually told some of her clients who she really was, and some of them blabbed.  Although she claims she was planning to leave the agency just as the story broke, since then, she has become a punchline.  Because society does have a madonna/whore complex (Tanya Harding/Nancy Kerrigan, anyone?).  And now, the Big Ten female athlete of the year will no longer be named after her.

Wow.  Where is all this decisive action when it comes to Penn State?  Fucking hypocrites.

I can sort of understand the decision to remove the name.  There is the question of propriety.  However, there are so many scandals and skeletons in the closet of so many athletes and sports programs, would this really have made a difference?  Especially given the revelation about Hamilton happened about a year ago?

Nope.  What we have here is society kicking someone while they are down.  Specifically, attacking a woman for being what they secretly fantasize about.

Here's the revelation that I warned some of you about -- I have actually dated a woman who did prostitution while she was in college and shortly afterward.  I won't say who she is, I won't tell you anything about her.  Just know that she's there (those of you who remember I dated a woman who was a professional dominatrix are probably going, "You dated a hooker...and?").  I didn't work out for some reason, there was no bad blood, there just wasn't enough to keep drawing us together and keep us in each other's lives.

And that's the thing -- there was a wonderful person there.  She was funny.  She was smart.  She was aware.  She had finally started her own business.  And she didn't want that little detail coming out because people instantly judge for it (she was shocked when I simply regarded it as a surprising revelation and not a deal breaker).  Women (and men, let's be honest, it's not just women doing this) fear the exact reaction Hamilton is getting, where everything you do, everything you have made yourself into, is ignored because of this one little thing.  And oftentimes, it's done because they are young and figure it's not big deal or they won't get caught or it's a thrill or they need to or...any one of a dozen reasons that validate far more accepted relationships.  A lot of people, regardless of gender or what kind of relationship will result, are missing out on having a terrific person in their corner because of a stupid label.

My point is this -- Hamilton has suffered enough.  Prostitution is not something people are generally proud of.  If they are, your cheap shots won't matter to them.  If they aren't, you are compounding a suffering and misery they have to live with every day, a fear that people they have tried so hard to earn the trust of, to earn the companionship of, will stomp away.

All you do is reinforce how alone they are.

They don't deserve to be alone.

And you don't have the right to make them feel that way.

Lay off.  You've made your point, you've shown your moral superiority.  Now let Hamilton repair her fractured life and leave her be.

Tags: destroying childhood memories, did not do the research, don't say i didn't warn you, don't try this at home, haven't we suffered enough, hypocrisy, i do all my own stunts, infernal gall, let's talk about sex bay-bee!, news, nightmare fuel, no sir i don't like it, not this shit again, portents of doom, self reflection, sez who? sez me!, stupidity, things that make you go hmm, this ought to be interesting, throwing elbows, wrong on every level, wtf
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